All Tuckered Out

I had a very cranky boy on my hands tonight.  From the moment we got home from school, he was not happy.  I can pretty much guarantee that this was because he did not get an afternoon nap.  Christian has been very slowly transitioning to one afternoon nap a day, but about half of the time, he still needs that morning nap.  This is especially true after he has a therapy session.  It really wipes him out.  So on therapy days, or after an active morning, he takes a morning and afternoon nap.  Well today he only got the morning nap, and by 5:30 he was done. 

We finally got a little piece when I served him dinner, but after a few minutes he started crying and rubbing his eyes.  “I’m tired momma.  I wanna go lie down.” he said, barely intelligible through sobs.  I pulled him out of his high chair, wiped him up, and carried him to his room.  He wouldn’t stop crying as I got him undressed.  Nick came in to help, and tickled Christian’s bare tummy with his beard as I pulled on his jammies.  Christian somehow managed to giggle and cry at the same time, something his dad and I found endearing and heartbreaking, all at once.  Nick asked if I was going to put him to bed, and I shrugged.  I was just past six o’clock, at least a couple hours away from his usual bedtime.  I thought I might be able to stall him a little while with a snuggle in the rocking chair, but when I mentioned the idea to Christian, his wails got louder.  It's funny how, depending on the reason behind the tears, some tantrums can be endearing, rather than like slow torture, which is how they usually feel.  All through Christian's miserable cries, I just thought how sweet he was.  Even Nick had a sympathetic face on.  So we laid him down in bed, and I crawled in next to him.

I got him all tucked in, with all his “guys” and picked a book to read.  Nick came and lay down on the other side of Christian, who was now quiet, and listened to the book with us.  Christian could barely keep his eyes open, but he stayed awake for two more books.  After I finished the third book, Tes came in and said goodnight, and I kissed my sleepy boy on the forehead, turned out the light, and closed his door.  It was 6:45.  Oh well, all we could do was cross our fingers that he would sleep past 4am.  My poor little tuckered out guy was finally happy, snuggled up with his guys, and probably dreaming about The Incredibles.  And for whatever reason, I found that I thought the last thirty minutes, which had been mostly filled with crying, were some of the most beautiful of the day.

Christian and his guys.

Found It!

For about a week now, we have been looking for Nick's passport.  It is expired, but would facilitate a much faster process to a new passport than starting over from scratch.  Nick is going on a trip in February and so we are getting down to the wire.  We have looked everywhere.  The main problem has been that when we moved last year, things ended up being thrown into boxes, not labeled, and stacked on our garage.  Those boxes are still stacked in the garage, an we had no idea which box it was in.  We both had already torn apart the garage, and every likely place in the house, several times.

Today was my last search before we gave in, and paid the fees to expedite the process to start the passport application from the beginning.  The garage was a mess when I walked in, and by the the I was ten minutes into my search, it looked like a tornado had hit it.  I had just finished going through every single photo in two different boxes of old pictures, and was about to give up.  I spotted a small box full of random junk, and thought maybe I should check there, just in case.  And there, under some old bills, a few toy trains, and a light bulb, was the passport.  I called Nick at work, and triumphantly told him my news.  You would have thought I just discovered oil in the backyard, we were both so happy.  Sometimes it's the smallest triumphs, that seem the most beautiful.

Where Milk Comes From

My daughter has an insatiable thirst for knowledge.  I consider this to be the single greatest thing about her.  When she decides something is interesting, she will find out as much as she possibly can about it.  She never accepts simple answers, and is always pressing for more information.  Today, there were two objects of that scrutiny.  The first was cows, and where milk comes from, in particular.  The second was the solar system.  Yup.  Cows and space.

This morning, as Tessie was drinking her milk, she looked at me in the kind of way that told me she had been thinking very hard about something.  However, I was not prepared for what she said.  “Mom, do you know what comes out of cows butts?  Milk.”  She was so sure about it, I tried very hard not to laugh as I said that, no, in fact milk did not come out of cows butts.  So this started a full on lesson on cows, and milk production.  I explained that girl cows have something called udders that stored milk for their babies.  I asked if she remembered how I used to feed her brother milk, and said that cows did the same thing for their babies.  She of course needed more information, so we found some photographs of cows online, and I showed her the udders and teats, explaining how people could pull on them and milk would come out.  I then pointed to her glass of milk, and said “And that’s where your milk comes from.”  She looked very doubtful, but didn’t question me any further.

Later that day she asked me if she could look at pictures of planets on the computer.  I don’t know where the planet interest came from, but we found pictures and videos online.  She even watched a documentary on the solar system during quiet time.  After asking me what different planets were made of, she finally seemed satisfied. 

During dinner I thought we could show off some of her new knowledge.  So I told Nick that Tes had learned a lot about cows today.  I turned to Tessie and asked her to tell her dad where milk came from.  She looked at him, and with a very proud look on her face announced “Boobies!”  Well it wasn’t really the answer I was looking for, but I guess she was technically correct.  Knowledge is a beautiful thing. 

A Beautiful Bedtime

Tonight I am very tired.  We had a late night, a long day, and a big dinner.  But I must say, it was a great day.  The kids were awesome.  Poor Nick got a migraine that knocked him out for most of the day, and I was worried about keeping the kids out of his hair.  But they were remarkably understanding, and even whispered when they were around him.  We played outside for a long time, then went to a movie.  After the movie we came home and had pizza, while the kids told their dad about the movie. 

By the time they finished dinner, it was getting really late, not even accounting for the fact that, because of daylight savings, it was actually an hour past bedtime.  However, they were covered in pizza sauce and needed a bath.  They stayed happy through the bath and putting on pajamas, but by the time we started to brush teeth Christian had had enough.  He looked right at me and said “I’m tired momma.”  I asked if he wanted to read books, and he said no, he wanted to go to bed.  So I laid him down, and he was out, just like that. 

After getting Tes to bed, we were getting ready to watch a movie, and I realized I had forgotten to give Christian his antibiotics.  He has an ear infection, and I really didn’t want to miss a dose.  So I grudgingly went back into his room, syringe of medicine in hand, and braced myself for the screaming that was about to ensue.  I turned on the light and looked at my son, so sweet and peaceful in bed.  I knelt down next to him, raised his face towards me, and started to squirt a little medicine into his mouth.  I was expecting him to wake up immediately, but instead he swallowed without even batting an eye.  He drank the whole dose, and stayed asleep.  I turned out the light and tiptoed out of the room.  I couldn’t believe how easy it was.  On a night when I am ready to fall asleep before even getting in bed, a super easy bedtime routine is more than appreciated, it’s beautiful.

The Sadness Creeps Out

I have gotten pretty good at putting a good spin on things, at looking on the bright side. I constantly try to focus on the progress Christian makes, and try very hard to stay away from thinking about what he can't do. But every once in a while, the sadness creeps out of the shadows, and I fall apart.

Today it came on me, unexpected, while I was at a friends house. I had a good morning with the kids. We had run some errands in town and Christian fell asleep on the way home. After a short nap, he woke up happy, and we walked next door to see some friends.

When we walked into her house the first thing I noticed was that it was clean, really clean. This was the start of my break down. You may not understand why the sight of a clean house would upset me, let me explain. I count on my girlfriends, especially my girlfriends who also have two children, to help me feel better by also having messy houses. It is an unspoken rule. If their houses are clean then I feel like I am doing something wrong. Silly, but it's the truth. The second offense was that her kids were happy, all by themselves. They were watching a movie, got up when they wanted something, and went back to the movie. Christian chose that moment to start freaking out. He didn't want to stay in one place for more than a moment, and since I am his means of locomotion, this meant I was carrying him from room to room, without end.

I finally ended up putting him in time-out on my girlfriend's bed. I was getting frustrated, and I will admit, a little sad, and I was the one who really needed the time out. When he was in time out my friend tried to make me feel better, but I was tearing up. All my frustrations with what my son was limited by, and what that meant for me were crashing together. I fell apart.

I pulled myself together and we wet home. I put Christian down for a nap, and thankfully, he went down easily. I told Tes it was time for a nap and she asked me to carry her upstairs. I picked her up and she wrapped her arms around me. By the time we got upstairs she was squeezing me so tight I was on the verge of tears. We stood in my room, holding each other, for the longest time. Finally I put her down, and went downstairs. But I felt renewed. Even though she had no idea why I was feeling down, my daughter was able to cheer me up, just by loving me. And that is the most beautiful gift I could have received at that moment.

My Little Mermaid

Once a week, Christian has therapy at the community pool.  For an hour he swims and stretches with his therapist in the wonderfully warm therapy pool.  Tessie usually sits on the steps and plays with the basket of pool toys.  Occasionally she will venture out into the pool, in my arms.  She has recently been a little more adventurous and has been circling the edge of the pool, while holding onto the rail.  I haven’t pushed her to do more than that, I do want her to love the water and feel as at home in it as I do, but I knew she would find that love in her own time.  Today it happened. 

When we arrived at the pool, Christian’s therapist asked if we wanted to start out in the big pool.  Christian loves the big pool, he refers to it as “the cold pool,” and is always asking to go in.  Tessie was hesitant, but when I said I would hold onto her the whole time, she agreed to get in.  As I was getting Christian into his swim trunks, Tessie found an idle pool noodle and carried it over to the pool.  I got in the pool and she climbed in after me.  Much to my surprise she held onto the noodle instead of me.  So I looped it under her arms, and pulling the noodle, I dragged her around the pool while she kicked enthusiastically.  We were having a great time with this arrangement when Tes suddenly said “Let go of me mommy.”  So I did. 

For the next hour and a half, Tessie swam all on her own with the noodle.  She kicked her way back and forth across the pool, laughing with glee.  Occasionally her face would dip under the water, and she would come up coughing, but she never asked me to hold her.  I was in awe, and so proud.  She kept calling out “Look at me, I’m doing it!  I’m such a big girl now!”  It was amazing. 

Recently Tes has really come out of her shell when it comes to being active.  She used to be so cautious about everything, but lately she is jumping into adventure after adventure.  Watching her swim around the pool made me a little homesick for Hawaii, but also excited about what our next trip out there will be like.  I can’t wait to see her splashing around in the ocean, my little mermaid.  I stayed in the big pool with her until her lips were blue and I was freezing, then after a brief hiatus in the therapy pool, she convinced me to get back in the big pool with her.  I didn’t mind at all, seeing her kick herself around, and loving it so much, was beautiful. 

The Grocery Store Date

This afternoon I timed my trip to the grocery store with Nick's trip to the dump, so he could drop off the truck we borrowed, and I could pick him up.  On the way into town, Tes fell asleep in the car, and stayed asleep while Nick climbed into the car, and we pulled into the grocery store parking lot.  So I left my husband and daughter in the car, and at the request of my son, I took him into the store with me.

I have been shopping with Christian alone on quick trips, but this was a full on "empty fridge" trip.  We were in for the long haul.  From the start, Christian was having a great time.  He laughed and joked with me.  He pointed out different foods he thought we needed.  He smiled and flirted with the people we passed.  We raced down the aisles, filled our cart, and had an absolutely wonderful time.  I had so much fun with him, I forgot that shopping is usually a chore.

The last item on our list was to pick up a few prescriptions.  As we were waiting for our turn at the counter, I started to sing the Winnie the Pooh song to Christian, and he joined me, singing quite clearly.  Just as he sang "enchanted neighborhood..." I heard someone say "awwww..." behind me.  I turned and saw that a very long line had formed behind us and everyone was looking at Christian.  I looked back at him, and saw him the way they all did; a handsome, charming little boy, sitting tall and proud, and soaking up all the attention like sunlight after a storm.  I swelled with pride.

When we pulled the cart up to our parked car, I said hi to Nick through the open window, then glanced back at Christian just in time to see him swiping a banana out of the cart.  I was shocked to see him turned all the way around in the cart, and pulling strong enough on the banana to actually pull it off the bunch.  All I could do was laugh, and peel the banana.  I had a great time at the grocery store today.  I really never thought I would say that.  Especially while shopping with even one of my children.  But Christian and I had a great time, nonetheless.  One might even say, it was beautiful.