The Long Road Home

This morning it was time to leave the peacefulness of the hot springs, and head back to the reality of wedding planning and kid raising.  I dropped the bride off at her parents' house, and then made the hour long drive home.  I hadn't spent that much time alone in my car in ages, and it was almost more relaxing than the springs had been.  I played my music loud, and sang along without being interrupted.  The wide New Mexico sky spread out around me, the blue interrupted only by a fine line of clouds on the horizon.  I slipped into that peaceful state of driving a long empty road allows, and felt truly rested and relaxed.  By the time I pulled into town I was refreshed, and ready to be a mom again.  All thanks to my beautiful solo drive.

Big Girl Time

Today kicked off the wedding weekend of a very dear friend of mine.  I have been helping her plan her wedding long distance, she is getting married here in Taos, but has been living in Chicago.  We have been working hard, and were ready for some rest and relaxation today, as we headed off with the rest of the bridesmaids to have an overnight stay at a nearby hot springs resort.  From the moment I got in the car, I started to relax.  It didn't take long to realize that this was more than a wedding weekend retreat for me, it was an opportunity to be just Chrissy, the woman, friend, and Matron of Honor, not Mommy.  I embraced the opportunity.

We arrived at the hotel, checked in, changed, and headed to the hot springs.   We started with a long leisurely lunch, then headed for the mud pit.  As we lay in the sun, letting the mud dry on our bodies and leech out our toxins and stress, I began to feel more like myself.  By the time we were soaking in the springs, I was completely relaxed, and utterly happy.  It turns out I have more to thank my girlfriend for than making me a part of her special day.  She gave me a gift every mother treasures, beautiful relaxation.

Wiped Out

As much fun as it is to have guests, it is inevitably disturbing to your daily routine.  The kids stay up late, we stay up even later, and we all wake up too early.  Naps don't happen at the right time, and usually meals don't either.  It's the symptom of too much fun had by all.  After our guests left today, I set about cleaning the house, put Christian down for a nap, and put a movie on for Tes.  After about five minutes, I walked by the couch to find my girl sound asleep.  She had played so hard that she didn't even make it past the previews to her movie.  I turned off the TV, made sure she wasn't going to roll off the couch, and let her get some beauty sleep.

Long Distance Freinds

Today some very good friends of ours came up for a visit. Although they are from New Mexico, they now split their time between Argentina and Montana, so we rarely see them. In fact, the last time they visited as a whole family was nearly two years ago. In spite of this, out daughters, who are about six months apart, are constantly talking about each other. When I told Tessie they were coming to visit she literally jumped for joy.

From the second they arrived, the girls were inseparable. There was no big show of reunion, they just started playing imeadiatly. They played dress up, puzzles, dolls, and roasted marshmallows together. They ended the night in the same bed, hugging each other fiercely. Although the shared bed didn't last all night, I was extremely impressed by their bond. At such a young age, I am amazed at the connection they have, and at the friendship that had stretched over time and distance. I don't think they know how beautifully lucky they are. 

The Best Twenty Dollars I've Ever Spent

Over the weekend I happened across a small purchase, that carried a huge reward.  While driving into town, I passed a garage sale, and instinctively looked over at it. I spotted a swing set in the yard, and did an immiediate u-turn.  It turned out that they were not selling the swing set, but a woman at the garage sale overheard me asking, and said she had a swing set for sale. Never one to pass up a fortuitous turn of events, I asked her about it. She said it was old, but still in fairly good shape, and she would let it go for twenty dollars. What??!! Twenty dollars for a wooden swing set? I was extremely skeptcal, but I found myself getting her number and promising to call so I could come check it out.

We made arrangements fore to come by the following morning, and although I told  myself it was probably too good to be true, I was excited. When I pulled onto the woman's driveway yesterday morning, I saw the swing set right away, and man, did it look funky. It was weathered and worn, and at some time in its life it had been used as a chicken coop. There was still chicken wire surrounding the bottom of the tower. But I didn't write it off. I examined it closely, shook it, checked the wood, then handed its former owner a twenty dollar bill. An hour later I was back with my neighbor, loading onto his trailer, and driving it home. 

This morning I got to work. I started by removing the chicken wire, and about a million staples. Then the power tools came out. I started sanding, and kept sanding for hours. Nick came home early from work, and we teamed up. By the early evening we had it looking pretty good. Nick had picked up some stain on the way home, and we soaked the whole thing. We let it dry while we had dinner, but were too excited to let it sit over night. Somewhat akeardly, we carried it to its new home in the backyard, and reassembled it. I couldn't believe the transformation! It was beautiful. 

The kids couldn't wait to try it put, and we couldn't wait to let them. Christian screamed in delight as he swung high onto the air, and Tessie cried out "I love this!" My heart swelled, and I felt pretty proud of myself. With twenty dollars, and a lot of luck and elbow grease, I gave my kids something that will bring them joy for years to come. Now that is a beautiful purchase. 

How Is Christian Doing?

There are moments when big realizations hit you, and maybe it's something that you have known for a while, but are suddenly made aware of.  These moments may not take up much time, but they are huge, nonetheless.  I had one of these moments today.  A friend came over for a visit, and we were sitting in the back yard, talking about our kids.  Of course.  She asked me a question that I get asked almost every day.  "How is Christian doing?"  Sometimes people ask this with a little hesitation, like they are worried I might say something bad.  Sometimes there is a hint of pity in the question, which I try to ignore.  And sometimes, especially from the people that know Christian well, it is simple curiosity over the progress of his therapy.  This friend's question fell into the last category, and I was happy to answer.  I told her how strong he was getting, that he was gaining confidence more and more everyday.  I said that his progress was still slow, and it might not seem like he was doing much, but that couldn't be further from the truth.  I said the biggest difference was that when I thought about his progress now it was without feeling... And then I wasn't sure how to finish.  "Hopeless?" my friend offered.  And I realized that she was right.  That all this time I felt an overwhelming sense of hopelessness when I tried to think of the future.  I couldn't picture Christian any way other than struggling.  I don't feel that way any more, I feel confident that he will surprise us all.  That moment of realization was uplifting, empowering, and overwhelming in its beauty.

Daddy, Throw Me Big!

We had a barbeque tonight at Nick's mom's house.  The kids had been there for most of the day, and Nick and I had been working in the shop.  When we arrived we took the kids outside to play, and enjoy the beautiful evening.  Nick's step-dad grilled some steaks and veggies, and we ate on the patio in the glow of the sunset.  It was pretty perfect.  After dinner, the kids wanted to play one more game of bean-bag toss before we went home, so we all migrated to the back yard.  Nick was holding Christian, and so he ended up facilitating Christian's absolute favorite activity, being hurled into the air.  He smiled at his Daddy and said "Daddy throw me big!" over and over until Nick obliged.  It's a rather terrifying thing to watch your child being thrown into the air, but his screams of delight make it impossible not to join in with his enthusiasm. 

The downside to this awesome game was that Christian didn't want to stop.  Everytime Nick stopped throwing him, Christian demanded more.  "Are you ready now Daddy?' he asked until Nick gave in.  When it was finally time to leave, Christian got upset over the idea of getting in the car.  Being the smart Daddy that he is, Nick used the game in his favor.  He told Christian he was going to "throw" him into the car, then pretended to do so, landing him softly in his car seat.  Christian looked at Nick, let out a big breath, and said "Whoa Daddy, that was intense!"  We roared with laughter, never having heard that particular word come out of Christian's mouth before.  What a beautiful surprise.